Speak Now
by Kaitlynleee
Summary: Everyone knows that finding true love isn't easy. Especially in a big city. All the good ones are taken. It's up to you to decide if love is worth fighting for.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey, hey. So I don't really think that I need to say this, but I just stole some names and character traits. If I had a book series that got made into a movie, I wouldn't be here. I promise. This is just to save me legal trouble...just in case.**

**Anyways, this story contains strong language, adult situations, and things virgin eyes shouldn't see. If you are at all opposed to any of the aforementioned items or don't like what I have written you are free to leave this story and find something that suits your fancy. I do enjoy constructive criticism, however don't rip me apart because you think you can. Haters gon hate, but just don't do it here. I'm a crier, and there is nothing worse than seeing a girl cry. Enjoy... and if you'd like to tell me how wonderful I am that's cool too. :)**

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><p><strong>May 15, 2010 (Three Months and Counting)<strong>

**Get You Home.**

"Tanya, I'm flattered that you would ask me…" I started.

"Great! Thank you so much! Uncle Charlie already agreed to walk me down the aisle. And you know you've always been more of a sister to me," Tanya rambled on at me. I didn't have the heart to tell her that my father, Charlie, never really got the chance to tell her 'no'; kinda like I'm not going to be able to say 'no', right now. Stupid cock-sucking bitch twisting my words around. "And you're sure your little friend Alice doesn't mind being my other bridesmaid?"

"Oh, she'll definitely be okay with it, but why do you want Alice?" If I was going to go through this torture, so was Alice. However, I was baffled that she wouldn't want her own friends joining her at the alter as she got married to some young hot-shot. Tanya loved rubbing that shit in her 'friends' faces.

"Well since we're having the wedding outside at his parents' estate, I just wanted to have a small bridal party," Tanya lied through her teeth. I had a feeling this was killing her. Tanya had only ever dreamed of a huge wedding with an even bigger reception. She must really love this poor sap.

"No, I meant, why Alice instead of Irina or Kate?" I clarified.

"Oh, well we sort of got in a fight when I started seeing Eddie. I think they're just jealous," my cousin admitted.

"Oh, Tanya, I'm soooo sorry," I almost gagged as the fake concern spewed from my mouth. She probably fucked the poor guy right out from under one of them. Out of everyone I knew, I hated this bitch of a cousin the most. And that was saying something.

"Okay, it's not a problem. You and Alice are my bridesmaids now. You need to come and stay in Seattle for the months up until the wedding. It's in August. You two have to help with the plans and everything. It's not much really just a small, simple wedding," Tanya gushed. She was probably ready to throw up at the idea. He must really be something, and she was just putting up with the wedding so she could sink her talons into him. "We're also having the reception on the estate, and there isn't going to be much for us to do—just colors and stuff—because Esme is just amazing. Ask your little friend if she wants to make your dresses, because God knows she won't like anything I pick out. Are you even listening to me Bella Swan?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, yeah. Alice is making our dresses," I mumbled. "We're moving into our apartment next weekend. So, let's do lunch sometime during the week after.

"That is so perfect, Belly!" she exclaimed. I only felt mildly bad for not telling Tanya that we were moving in as we spoke, but then she called me 'Belly'. That's when the concern went flying out the window. Also, I now had an extra week to relax before having to deal with Tanya everyday for three months straight.

"Alright, I'll see you then, Tanya." I hung up before she could go into detail about Eddie's assets again. _Shudder._

"Alice, you're going to be Tanya's other bridesmaid, and you're making the dresses," I informed my best friend as we unpack our stuff. We were moving into our new Seattle loft.

"Someone wants to marry that slut?" she giggled. I couldn't help but laugh with her, because her thoughts had exactly mirrored my own.

"Apparently," I shrugged.

"Have you ever even met this guy?" Alice asked from the other side of our new living room.

"I didn't know Tanya was even dating someone, let alone engaged," I answered. "She said something about not seeing any point in waiting. They're supposedly in love and their families expected out of them anyway. Yadda, yadda, yadda. You know I tend to try and tune out Tanya's chatter."

"That's true. The poor thing probably doesn't even have a choice. Tanya's crazy like that," Alice giggled. We unpacked the rest of the living room in companionable silence.

"Clubbing tonight, B?" Alice suggested, before we moved on to our own respective rooms. Effectively getting my mind off of the fuckery that was waiting for me in the months leading to Tanya's wedding. She knew me so well.

"That sounds perfect," I sighed.

"Maybe you'll meet a hot guy to take your mind off thing," said Alice.

"I fucking hope so. That is just what I need right now," I admitted to my partner in crime.

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's get you slutted up!" Alice was an unstoppable force of nature when she was excited. So, like any good friend would, I sat back and let her expose half of my slender body for the opposite sex to see.

I was a little self-concious in the itty bitty dress Alice forced me into. It was a baby pink halter dress with a plunging neckline so low I was forbidden to wear a bra. On Alice, the dress was a normal mid-thigh length. Stupid pixie was a whole head shorter than me. So, I was lucky that it covered my ass, and if I happened to bend down, everyone in the whole damn club would have a front row seat for a viewing of my coochie. The shoes I was worried about, too. I could barely walk straight on a flat surface with bare feet. She was obviously trying to kill me with these four inch heels.

We stepped out of the cab with careful finesse and slid right up to the bouncer. Alice ignored the grumbles of the 'lowlys' in line and grabbed the behemoth's hand. She slipped a bill in it and gave him an ample view of her enhanced cleavage. He let us in automatically, still marveling at the hundred in his huge palm.

Alice dragged me to the bar in order to start our tab for the night. I asked for my drink of choice, a cranberry and vodka. Alice ordered a dirty martini.

"Surely such a beautiful girl isn't here alone," a velvety voice whispered provocatively in my ear.

"Surely you can do better than that. Try again," I replied, turning around. I was pleasantly surprise to see the face that owned the lovely voice.

"Dance with me," he gently commanded.

"There you go. That was much better." I smiled as I took his hand. Briefly, I looked back to Alice. She mouthed, 'Oh my God.' All I could do was nod in agreement.

The beautiful stranger turned me into him. He was tall and muscular—but not overly so like some kind of meat head. He had deep green eyes that perfectly complimented the sexy, disheveled reddish-brown hair on top of his gorgeous head.

"Bella," I introduced myself simply.

"Beautiful Isabella," he murmured softly. I could barely hear him over the music, but I wasn't sure if I was supposed to. "I'm Edward."

"How uncommon," I laughed, and his face contorted to where he thought I was making fun of his name. "No, I like it. It's old-timey and unique," I laughed again. This time, I got the pleasure of him laughing with me.

The song ended and we made our way back to where we had met at the bar. Alice, however, was no where to be found. Edward noticed me looking around and pointed her out for me. She had her back turned to us, and she was dancing with a tall, blonde surfer type that she just adored. I quickly send her a text claiming the apartment for tonight, while Edward was turned to the bartender getting us another round drinks. He handed me a glass and I took an appreciative sip.

"Mmmm, you pay attention," I remarked after another long sip of my cranberry and vodka.

"Isabella, you are the most beautiful thing I have seen in some time. Any guy would be and idiot not to pay attention to you," he replied sweetly, taking a swig of his own drink. I guessed that it was Jack and Coke.

"Look, I feel as if I should let you know that I have already decided that you are coming home with me. Spitting game isn't really necessary. You probably think that I sound like a cheap slut or something, but whatever. I don't do this every night. I've just had a rough couple of weeks," I divulged to my suitor of the night.

"I would never classify you as cheap or slutty. And just to let you in on a little secret, I wasn't going to take 'no' for an answer." He smiled a crooked grin that had me weak in the knees.

I hadn't even noticed that my drink was empty, until he handed me a new one. As soon as I finished, he grabbed me up and whisked us away to dance again. The way his arms wrapped so affectionately around me made me want to change my mind about only having sex with Edward.

Three more drinks and lots of dancing later, we were blindly making our way up to mine and Alice's loft. There was a ton of kissing and groping. I was reveling in the intensity I felt from this man that I had only known for a couple of hours. I can honestly say that I have never ever felt like this when I was with anybody else. Not even James, and we dated for years before I let him get this far.

"Keys, beautiful," Edward demanded breathily.

I threw my clutch purse at him. While my sexy guy concentrated on getting the door open, my lips made their way down to kiss on his neck. Edward finally opened the door and crushed me against the inside once it was closed. He slid his hands up the ridiculously short dress I had borrowed from Alice. I hitched one leg up over his hip and the other one followed, crossing my ankles at this butt to keep me up. My hands wove into his soft fuck hair, just like I had been imaging all night.

Before kissing under my earlobe, he panted, "Bedroom." The sensation of his hot breath on my neck literally left me breathless.

"Down the hall to the right," I answered in a moan as she slid the top of my dress to the side, exposing my breast. Seeing as how I wasn't allowed to wear a bra tonight, Edward instantly got a peek of my now erect nipple.

"Mmmm, delicious," he hummed into my cleavage.

"Just get me into bed, damn it," I groaned, rubbing myself into the strain of his jeans.

He practically ran to my room and dropped me on the bed. I giggled as I bounced once on the plush mattress. He climbed on top of me and growled playfully. At first, it was weird. Then, I realized how much fun I was having with him.

"These have got to go, my sexy man," I said seductively pulling on the fly of his pants.

I fiddled with the button until I realized that he was just watching me. "What are you doing Edward? Take off your shirt, and I'll let you unwrap your prize," I whispered, nibbling on his ear.

"And what a prize it will be. I never win," he teased, giving me that panty-dropping crooked smile.

I had finally wrangled his jeans open, and I flipped us over so that I could tug them down torturously slow. "I'm the best prize you'll probably ever receive," I replied.

"I bet. Can I unwrap you now?" He didn't wait for a response before changing our position. Edward hovered over me, and I ogled his gloriously naked form as he all but ripped the fabric away from my body. He stared amazed, "No panties? You're such a dirty little girl."

At this point, I was grinding my bare center on him and had lost any and all rational thought hat I possessed. "Oh my God! Please, I need you," I screamed.

"Wait, wait. Do you have a condom?" Edward asked a sensible question, but right now, being sensible isn't what I wanted. I wanted sex. Now.

"Do you trust me?" I asked breathlessly.

"Well, we don't really know each other…" he trailed off, about to say something else when I stopped him.

"I'm on the pill, and I don't usually do this. So, I'm clean. Just fuck me," I begged, just trying to get off in my drunken haze.

"If you're sure," he agreed. I moaned embarrassingly loud when he finally thrust inside of me.

"Ungh, you're so fucking tight. Shit!" he groaned into my neck.

"Oh damn! You feel so good!" I moaned.

Apparently, these were the magic words, because with one more big thrust he was balls deep. He continued with long thrusts, almost pulling completely out before filling me to the hilt again. I was glad that he seemed just as affected by me as I was by him.

"Fuck Edward. Harder! Fuck me harder," I ordered, and, God bless him, he obliged immediately. I plucked at my nipples, as he drilled into my waiting pussy with the perfect amount of roughness.

"Touch yourself, beautiful." He eased my hand down towards where we were connected. Before rubbing my nub, I felt his thickness sliding in and out of me. He hissed at the added feeling of my warm hand. "I'm not going to last much longer, if you keep that up, gorgeous."

"I want you to cum with me," I panted. Again, it seemed I had the magic words. As soon as they left my mouth, he pinched my clit and came inside of me, simultaneously. Edward collapsed on top of me panting. He rolled off, after kissing my head, and walked into my bathroom.

"Come back here, stud. I wasn't finished with you yet," I called after him.

He rushed back in and jumped on my bed. "You don't have to tell me twice you beautiful, beautiful girl."

I crawled on top of Edward and started to kiss down his perfectly sculpted chest to the super sexy v of his hips. I licked the bronze hairs that formed a very happy trail down to his cock and felt him harden even more. He was now pressing greedily into my cleavage.

"Mmmm, you're so hard for me," I murmured.

I looked into his forest green eyes and gave his tip one little lick, swiping the little bead of pre-cum off he top. Next, I gave a long lick from base to tip, and Edward hissed. My mouth covered his head and sucked lightly. I was teasing him in the most delicious way, and he could tell.

One of his strong hands twined long fingers in my hair to guide me. The last time someone tried to fuck my mouth, the night ended in a trip to the hospital; I was not too happy. Now, however, I couldn't get enough of his controlling side. It was turning me on hardcore.

"Just like that, my beautiful Isabella." The way my full name rolled off of Edward's soft, masculine lips made me wonder why I hated it so much.

I kept up my ministrations on his hard and tasty dick. His hips started to buck up to meet my mouth, and I was none to thrilled about this. I used my hand to push down on him. He stopped and to reward him for his cooperation, I cupped his sac and squeezed gently.

"Fuck! I'm going to cum… like right now, Isabella." He ended his warning in a grunt as his seed spilled down my throat. I'm not going to lie and say it tasted like candy or some shit like that, but damn if it wasn't the best-tasting spunk I've ever had. "Shit, you swallow? That is hot as fuck." He was panting even harder now.

"I'm so horny right now. Do you think your little beastie is ready for more?" I asked.

"Your words are fucking magical, woman," he said. He made no move to roll us over, so I took that as my cue for control.

"You want to watch my tits bounce as I ride you?" The slutty words rolled out of my mouth naturally before I could stop them. It was like he brought out this wild side of me that had been forever dormant. And I fucking loved it.

"Mmmm, my dirty little girl," Edward sighed happily, sliding his hands up to settle on my hips. Just as I went to impale myself with is well endowed cock, I heard some incessant buzzing.

"Shit-ass motherfucking damn dumbass luck," he cursed to himself.

"Sorry, beauty. That's my phone," apologized Edward.

"Go get it, but make it quick. I still want you." I smacked his ass as he got out of bed and searched for his phone in his jeans. I bit my lip and grinned cheekily when he looked back at me.

"Hello? Yeah, yeah… No, I'm going to stay here tonight… Okay have fun… You too… Alright, bye." Was all I could hear of the conversation.

"Stupid cock-blocker," he hissed.

"Everything okay?" I really didn't want him to have to leave—which was weird—but I guess I would have to understand if he did.

"It's fine, but you, pretty girl, wore me out. Time for bed," Edward scooped me up in one arm and put me underneath the covers. He climbed in on the other side. I cuddled up to his out-stretched arm. He curled it around me, and I placed my small hand on his chest in the light dusting of coppery hair.

"Goodnight, my sexy man. Tonight was just what I needed," I mumbled half asleep.

"The pleasure was all mine, beautiful girl. Get some sleep," he said.

In my sleepy daze, I could mildly feel an electric pulse where we were touching. I faintly remember it from the rest of the night, too. However, I was too damned tired to do anything but revel in the blissful feeling of it. I drifted off into the best night's sleep I've ever had. I was sure it had something to do with the wonderful man next to me.


	2. Chapter 2

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own the rights to the character names or any similarities found to the Twilight Saga. Do any of you actually read this? I could say I have a pink dog named Skippy who has all four limbs but only walks on three of them and I'm pretty sure you all know that I don't own Twilight.**

**Moving on, I hope my last author note didn't scare anyone from reviewing. I promise I do love feedback. Please, please, please don't leave me hanging. Tell me what you think.**

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><p><strong>May 16, 2010 (Two Months, Thirty Days, and Counting)<strong>

**More of You.**

I woke alone in my bed after a night of the most amazing sex my pathetic existence has ever seen. I was clutching a pillow to my chest. It still smelled like him, like honey and sunshine. But, where was he? The light wasn't on in my bathroom, and I couldn't hear anything in the rest of the loft. Panic began to set in. Had he left me? Was I not good enough for him to stay the night?

I turned to my nightstand, intent on getting my cell phone. I was in serious need of some girl-talk, and I had no fricking clue where my best friend was. However, I didn't get a chance to even think about Alice or my cell, when I saw the note and daisy perched upon the wood fixture.

_Good morning, beautiful. I'm sorry I'm not there to see your gorgeous sleepy face. You looked too angelic for me to wake up. Come and get your breakfast in the kitchen when you wake up._

—_Yours, Edward_

I reread the elegant script—not messy man hand writing—three times. I wasn't used to being treated this sweetly. I swooned. For once, I wasn't getting an awkward morning after. I hopped out of bed, forgoing any form of clothing. Edward was standing in the kitchen all of his naked glory was covered by only the pink apron that Alice had gotten me when we moved in. He was at the stove, cooking for _me_. I watched him from the stairs, until he turned around and silently beckoned me to him.

"Cute. It looks much better on you than it does on me," I whispered into his ear, after he pulled me into a hug.

"I highly doubt that, you silly girl," Edward responded.

"I assure you, you're ass looks spectacular poking out of that pink apron," I giggled.

"I'm sure it does. Now sit, breakfast is almost done. I wanted to surprise you, but alas here you are." Edward turned back to the stove. I went back to staring at his ass unabashedly.

"I can feel you staring ay my ass," he jabbed. I laughed not ashamed in the least. My humility flew to the floor with my clothes last night. "Do you have anything better to do than bask in my naked glory all day?"

He joked, but sadly I did have something to do. I had to work. Bleh. I shouldn't have been complaining, however. My friend, Angela, had hooked me up with a sweet deal at her flower shop while I finished school. I didn't want to give up this perfect opportunity to get to know the hunky man that sexed me up last.

"Unfortunately, I have to work today," I sighed and a not-overly-so-but-perfectly-muscled arm wrapped around me.

"I'm sorry to hear that beautiful girl. I was hoping to treat you the way I was raised. Last night, though you were much too tempting," he apologized. It was completely unnecessary.

"I have a proposition for ya," he nodded for me to go on, "you treat me to an extra indulgent shower and I'll put you in for a rain check."

"I'd be honored to take you up on that offer, you beautiful girl," Edward replied his whole face lighting. Although, I couldn't help the insecure part if my brain that was telling me that's exactly how he viewed me: a beautiful little girl, too fragile to be taken seriously.

"Well come on handsome. I don't know how long we'll have alone." With that, I kicked that insecure bitch's ass and tied her up in the closet. When I reached for Edward's hand, he twined his fingers with mine and followed me to the bathroom.

Once we stripped down, it was like we were feeding off of each other. I would pleasure him and then—not going to be out done—Edward would make me cum twice as hard. When we finally came together, the feeling was just as euphoric as last night. He kissed my forehead gently as we calmed down. Then, he washed me. It was a feeling of complete bliss, seeing as how no one had ever made me feel so cared about, like I was the only girl he would ever think about.

I got out of the shower high on the euphoric feeling of this gorgeous man. We got ready together in my bathroom completely in sync, like we'd been living together for year. Once we were both dressed and ready for the (rest of the) day, he walked me out to my car, where we shared one last intense kiss before parting ways. I got in my Volkswagen Jetta, while he went to the elevator to catch a cab home.

The store was busy when I pulled, but then again that was to be expected. Ang had THE hottest new flower store in Seattle. Everyone wanted flowers from _Once Upon a Petal_. Since it was my first day, I was doing crap-ass paperwork for hours. Then, time came for me to learn the rounds. Finally, we finished at the register, where I would be working for the duration of my shift. Register duty consisted of taking orders and organizing them and, of course, taking people's money.

Apparently I was a natural people person, and I didn't even know it. I've always considered myself an introvert―preferring to stay away from large crowds, while Alice continually thrust herself in headfirst―but my fake vivacity had been mistaken for genuine. In the late afternoon, close to closing, it had finally slowed down enough in the shop for me to make some sense out of the absolute mess that was behind the counter. I heard the bell on the front door jingle alerting me to a customer, as it was now at a level of quiet that I could actually hear the damned thing. I didn't turn around, however, figuring that Ang was lurking throughout the floor and could help whoever was there ten times easier than I could.

"Excuse me. I'm looking for some flowers that say 'I love you because I have to.'" I immediately recognized the deep, pure as honey voice that I'd come to adore and snapped my whole body around to face him. Neither made a move to speak; we just stared silently for a moment or two.

I spoke first, regaining my wits sooner, "Well if those are for me, I should hope the weekend wasn't 'because you had to.'"

"Of course not," he replied after a minute still in shock. "Your flowers would be the most amazing, fantastical, and expensive ones in the entire store. These are for a friend of the family."

"What are you doing tonight, you smooth-talker," I giggled like a tween with her first crush. I was so ashamed with myself that I couldn't even look Angela in the eyes as I felt her stare in the back of my head. There was no way in hell I was getting out of that conversation later. I might as well invite her over for pizza later, so I only have to face the firing squad once. Alice will be brutal enough for both of them.

"I've got a date night with my parents, actually," he responded flirtatiously, blushing just a little bit.

"That's really sweet."

"Yeah, I suppose. It's kind of a tradition, so my mom still gets to see me even though I get really busy." He slid his hand through his hair, which I knew meant he was extremely uncomfortable. I called Angela over, because she would know better than I would where the perfect bouquet of flowers would be located. This was her store after all.

Ang gave me a look that clearly said I was not off the hook. I nodded, knowing exactly what she wanted. As she led him away I let out a sigh I didn't realize I was holding back. I was in way too deep already. I shouldn't like him this much; he was a one night stand for crying out loud. Falling in love with a one night stand was Alice's MO, and I had seen it backfire one too many times. I wasn't looking for anyone right now, but he had somehow pounded his way into my system.

"I've got to say, Angela, you've got a good eye. This is exactly what I had in mind for tonight." I heard his silky smooth voice as he made his way to the register with his bounty. The flowers were very pretty, but they didn't scream emotional attachment. He was right, they were exactly what he had come in describing to me. I was busying myself so that I didn't appear to be watching his every move. Lord knows that I was a horrible liar. If he caught me, there would be no talking my way out of it.

"Ahem," he cleared his throat theatrically, "is there any way I can get some help? I know this really gorgeous check out girl, but I can't seem to locate her," he said with the cheesiest smile on his face.

"You are awfully corny, maybe I'll have to rethink that whole rain check thing from this morning." I tapped my chin playfully. As if I would ever say no to another go around on his naked body. It was far too glorious to pass up.

After a little more banter and an exchange of phone numbers, I rang him up and sent him on his way with the promise of a night to come next week some time. The bell on the door chimed out his departure and the wolf descended.

"So little missy, what was that all about? I've never seen you so flirty before," Angela was on me like white on rice.

"It's nothing Ang. He was just a one night stand," I fibbed. Yes, he was an ONS but not just that. I wanted to see him again…so badly.

"Yeah alright miss I'm going to twirl my hair and shoot off flirty smiles to a fine ass guy." I knew she wasn't going to believe me, even if it was a half-truth.

"Seriously, he was a one night stand, but you saw him. How could I not want a repeat performance?" I knew I had her there. He was hot as hell and even though she is happily married to a Mr. Ben Cheney, she could attest to his great, manly assets.

"Too true. I just don't want to see you do something you'll regret, Bella. We've both seen how Alice gets when she loses herself to a one nighter. It doesn't usually end in a white dress. Relief usually comes in the form of two replacements: Ben and Jerry." Angela always had a way of being the level headed one in our friendship. I knew she was right. Heck, I had just told myself almost the exact same thing.

"I know Ang I'm not losing my head or anything, but after James, I could use a little fun sexy times in my life. He just made me feel so gorgeous and wanted and damn… you know what they say about big hands?" I waggled my eyebrow to let her know exactly what I was alluding to. The giggles she burst into let me know that she got it.

Angela followed me back to the loft after we closed up shop. We walked into my new place with pizza and beer in hand. We were going to get our buzz on and share sex stories. Best, worst, funniest. I had a feeling that nothing was going to be off limits tonight. That was the plan. I imagined a lot of these nights to come in the next years as I worked on my graduate studies and Alice interned at one of the fasted growing indie clothing labels in the city. Alice squealed when she saw Angela follow me in. This was a reunion of epic proportions for them. As much as I kept in contact with Angela, Alice hadn't actually seen Ang since we graduated. It was good to have the girls back together. Forks High was never the same since the night after graduation, I'd imagine.

"Bellaaaaa, you had better be ready to spill about last night!" Alice sang as I went to take my shoes off. "I had better have gotten kicked out of my new bedroom for a damn good reason."

I snorted at that. "Like you didn't have a perfectly pleasing time with Mr. Surfer."

"That is beside the point. I had a great time, but Bella, this is the first time you've let loose since James. I'm glad you are finally getting over him. And Mr. I-have-my-life-figured-out from last night was the perfect place to start."

"Start? Jesus Alice. You sound like you're about to start whoring me around the greater Seattle area," I gasped laughing at the wounded expression on her face.

"I would never exploit you like that," she pouted, but I could see the smile underneath. "You'd make much more on a pole."

We all giggled profusely. As promised, we steered the conversation turned to our actual sexual experiences. Angela—of course, being married—only had stories about Ben's romantic gestures gone wrong, though those were some of the best ones of the night. Alice and I only had our days as co-eds to go off. Not that that bothered either of us. We had some great stories as well.

"No, I'm being completely serious about that. He actually asked me if I would finger his ass while I sucked. Needless to say, all sexual desires were gone from my mind. I couldn't even do it, and I was drunk. I'm pretty sure I actually laughed with his dick in my mouth." I shuddered at the memory and took another swig of my beer.

"Oh my God! That is too good," Angela gasped between guffaws. "I almost wish I was single in my college days so I could have experienced some of these things."

"Oh please," Alice interjected. "You and Ben have been attached at the hip since his balls dropped. There was no other souls that could've handled either of you." Her eyes got a little misty, and I knew she was playing out one of her overly romanticized fantasies about finding the elusive 'one'.

"That's true. Sometimes I wish we hadn't eloped though. I would've loved for you to plan my wedding Alice. Your overly romantic mind is perfect for that," Angela commented nostalgically.

"Pish posh. That was the most spontaneous thing you two have ever done. You had to have enjoyed the rush of it," I laughed. They were the most straight laced couple I've ever seen. It was too perfect.

"Alright, enough beating around the bush Bella, tell us about your hot lay last night," Alice demanded after I went to get another round for us.

"Oh. My. Goodness. It was perfect. He was sooo responsive and was such a good listener. As soon as I said something, he did it. No questions asked. And holy guacamole, he was huge. All in all, it was wondrous." I gushed, completely uninhibited.

"Are you going to see him again?" asked Alice. She was hanging on every word unabashedly entranced by what I was saying.

"It's definitely a possibility," I didn't want to tell her that I had already planned on it. She would insist on a double date with Mr. Surfer.

"Oh whatever, Bella. You should've seen her when he came into the shop today. She already has a 'rain check' planned." Damn you Angela. She used air quotes and everything.

"Bella that is so perfect! You two can double with me and Jasper!" she shrieked.

"Who?" I asked dumbly.

She huffed, "Mr. Surfer. From last night." Bingo. I really knew her all too well. I suppose we were best friends for a reason.

"Alice, I don't even know if it is going to go anywhere. Just because I'm not letting James stop me from unleashing my sexy, wild side, doesn't mean I'm ready for another relationship…especially with someone I barely know." I only left out the part where I wanted to get to know him. I wanted to see if it could go somewhere which was so foreign for me to even think; there was no way I could tell Alice and Ang that.

We laughed and gossiped for another hour or so before we called it a night. We called Ben to come and get his sleepy wife. There was no way we were letting her drive in her inebriated state. I dropped into my bed after stripping and putting on my oversized Seahawks shirt. I drifted into a perfect sleep with visions of my personal Adonis in my head.


	3. Chapter 3

**DISCLAIMER: Clearly, I didn't write Twilight. If I had there would've been laser cats somewhere hidden in that angst riddled plot. I just really enjoy seeing what my mind conjures when it roams free and not having to create character profiles cuts that time in half. **

**Enough with the boring, 'please don't sue me' stuff and on with the show. I'll see you folks at the bottom.**

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><p><strong>May 26, 2010<strong>

**(Two Months, Twenty Days, and Counting)**

**Say It's Always been Me.**

The next week and a half flew the freak by. I couldn't believe it was already the day I'd planned to meet Tanya for lunch. Gag. I was not too excited to sit around with fake smiles and hollow congratulations for my skank ass cousin and the poor thing that got tricked into marrying her. There was no way he actually knew what he was getting himself into.

On the much, much brighter side, I had seen Edward several times and had plans to see him tonight. I couldn't wait; he knew just how to make my day better, especially after talking to Tanya. I didn't want to bog down my time with him by talking about her though, so whenever he would ask what was wrong I would brush it off by saying family issues. It wasn't entirely untruthful. She was family, and she had a lot of issues…mostly pertaining to the crazy that was spreading throughout her brain.

"Oh Bella, you are not wearing that." Alice interrupted my inner monologue with her death 'you are changing right the fuck now' look. It was enough to make comfy outfits every shrivel in the back depths of my closet. "We are going to a nice patio restaurant. You are not—I repeat are not—going dressed for a sports bar. This place requires a floral print dress and a cardigan." I started to whine, but was cut off by the 'I mean business, missy' look. It was amazing how much she could say without even opening her mouth, though that had never stopped her.

I changed without much more argument while Alice got my bathroom ready for my torture. Torture came in the form of mouse and eyelash curlers and foundation and several brushes that I didn't even know what they were for. You would think that I would be used to the ridiculousness of going somewhere with Alice after the many years our friendship has survived, but I honestly did think I ever would. I settled into my happy place and let her have free reign, and before I knew it we were en route.

"Alright, how bad could he be?" Alice asked me as we drove her bright yellow Porsche to the restaurant where we were meeting Tanya and her fiancée.

"Pretty bad, I mean he's obviously stupid enough to marry Tanya," I tried to explain to my best friend. "She didn't even tell me she was bringing him until like two minutes ago, and then it was too late for us to back out."

"You seriously need to calm down." Alice was pulling into the parking lot now. I didn't say anything. I just had to focus on watching my mouth around that bitch and her bitch.

"Belly Bean!" Tanya enthused when we walked onto the patio. It was a surprisingly nice day in the rainy city of Seattle. "Belly, Alice. I'd like you to meet my Eddie."

"You're engaged," I fumed when I looked into the face of who I thought was going to be the love of my life… eventually. I looked to Alice, and she looked about twenty times angrier than I felt.

"You're engaged," I said again, "to my cousin. I'm the maid of honor at your fucking wedding to my cousin."

"Shit!" was the only thing he could think to mutter under his breath.

"Am I missing something? Do you two know each other?" Tanya demanded.

"I'm going to be sick," I said and rushed to the nearest flower pot.

As I was spewing my guts, I heard his lame ass excuse, "Bella works at the flower shop. She picked the flowers out that I bought you." It was probably a good thing Tanya was stupid. I never would've bought that.

"Alice," I croaked my voice rough from the acid that just flew out of my mouth, "I need to go home".

"I'll do it," my previously favorite voice said with the authority I used to love.

"Eddie," whined Tanya, "we're here to talk about wedding stuff."

"Tanya you know I'm not really into all the girly details. You stay and plan with Alice, and I'll make sure Bella is okay," Edward tried to reason with her. He no doubt wanted to talk to me and make me feel even worse about fucking and falling in love with my cousin's fiancée.

"But how am I supposed to get home, Eddie? Remember what I promised you," Tanya suggested. The statement made me struggle out of Edward's capable arms and back to my puke pot. I could hear Tanya still whining about being left alone with my best friend instead of rubbing her perfect groom to be in our faces, as my puke turned into dry heaves.

"Tanya, let's stay. Then, I'll take you back to our loft; the two of you can leave from there. Bella looks weak and I'm not going to be strong enough to help her get to bed. It must have been the Chinese we had last night. I told Bella her pork was undercooked," Alice explained to get me and this asshole alone. Et tu, brute? She came to hug me before letting me leave with Edward. "Just talk to him Bella. I promise I'll kick him in the balls after if you want me to," she whispered squeezing me tightly.

"Well, that sounds reasonable. Isn't my Eddie just the sweetest thing," the bitch swooned. I bit back my comment about him being MY Eddie, but I reminded myself that he wasn't. He was fucking engaged for Christ's sake.

"Come on, Bella." He swooped me easily into his arms dutifully, just like he had done sweetly only a week earlier.

I could only grunt in disgust as I breathed in his once precious scent. He carried me too his stupid shiny Volvo—which we had just recently christened—and placed my weak body in the passenger seat, where only the day before I had given him head. The drive home was silent, and had I possessed the energy, I would have flung myself out of the car at a red light.

I didn't fight him as he picked me up to carry me to my loft. I wanted to scream and slap and pace and yell and curse and fight and hurt him, but I couldn't. Despite the fact that he hurt me in the most awful way, I still felt very strongly for him. That much was obvious. If I didn't, it wouldn't hurt as bad as it did. I wanted to be with him. I would let him explain, even though it could possibly kill me.

"Isabella. My beautiful Isabella, I'm so, so sorry," he finally whispered after he set me on the bed and took off my jeans and bra. I wanted to swoon at how he remembered that those were the things I just couldn't relax in. His voice sounded so pained. I wanted to take it all away, but he had done this. He had made his bed and now had to lie in it. I wanted answers. I deserved answers for what he did to me. To us. We could have been so great together. It was easy. It was passionate. I'm pretty sure it was love.

"Why?" I was choked up with unsure tears.

"I don't know," he said. He was still whispering, and after looking at him, I realized that he was about to cry as well.

"That's bullshit," I rasped with force. "I want the _whole_ fucking story."

"Tanya's parents have been friends of my parents for as long as I can remember. She was my first kiss, my first fuck, my first everything really. I've never really liked her, though. It wasn't like how it feels when I'm with you. It was more of a convenience than anything. We dated off and on all throughout high school. I never had a problem getting girls when we were 'off', but my folks weren't happy unless we were together.

"I finally got the balls to tell them to fuck off when I was in college. I told them that I was going to date who I wanted. They gave in for a little bit, but when I got into medical school last year, they sat me down and said that if I didn't marry Tanya, then they were going to cut me off. I've put off the wedding for as long as I could because as much as I tolerate Tanya, I know she isn't the girl I want to spend the rest of my life with. I didn't think I'd ever find that girl...until I found your beautiful face in that club." Edward sighed when he concluded his tale. I couldn't help it; I kissed him.

"You're an asshole. Why didn't you tell me? You let me believe that we were together, when this whole time you were engaged to my bitch of a cousin." I ranted as soon as he let go of my lips. Then, I summoned all of the gumption I possessed and slapped him.

"What was I supposed to say? 'I'm engaged, but I don't love my fiancée. I love you.'"

"You love me?" I asked with a small voice.

"Yes. Isabella Swan, I love you with all of my heart. I was going to tell you tonight. I know it's too soon to be in love, but I don't give a shit. Everyone in my family tree has been like that. Not necessarily 'love at first sight', but pretty damn close. You're all I ever think about," Edward declared earnestly.

"I love you, too, you stupid, stupid man. I could feel the strong emotions, but hearing you say it sort of made everything real. Like what I'm feeling is right. It doesn't change anything though, does it?" I sighed.

"Not unless I catch Tanya cheating," he said despairingly.

"That shouldn't be too hard," I giggled through the tears that were still in control.

"Really? You think?" he scrubbed his face with both hands before letting out a groan. "I wish shit wasn't so fucking complicated," he cursed. "I just want to be with you. The past week and a half has been the most blissfully happy of my life. I can see myself with you for the long haul."

"I know what you mean. When Tanya suggested that you two were going to fuck, I lost it. I wanted to gouge her eyes out for even thinking about you naked," I confessed.

"If you would care to know, that night with you after the club was the first time I've came by something other than my hand in months. I just get her off like twice, and she's so exhausted that we never actually get to the sex part. She thinks that I'm mad at her for it. She was suggesting making it up to me, but I just can't get it up with her," Edward divulged.

"Well, honestly, I'm still mad at you for lying to me. That was a big freakin' lie," I admitted.

"I didn't lie to you, love," he teased. I gave him a look that said I was in no mood to be messed with. He sighed, "I've been trying to figure out how I can get out of this without having to tell my parents that I refuse to marry her. And I don't think you will ever understand how sorry I am for this whole big clusterfuck of a situation. I am so, so sorry for hurting you like this."

I rested in bed as we waited for Alice to return with queen bitch in tow. I didn't say much; I was still too mad. He whispered soothing words of apology into my ear from his spot next to me. I let him kiss my hair, but I never turned to face him. I knew if I did, I would melt and forgive him. Then we'd have sex, and there wasn't enough time for that. As I thought about Tanya and still having to be her maid of honor, despite loving her groom, a few silent tears streamed down my face.

"Love, are you crying?" Edward asked. Okay, so maybe they weren't so silent. Sue me for wanting him to feel guilty. I turned now to bury my head and let my tears dampen his shirt.

"I can't watch you leave with her," I whimpered into his chest.

"I know. I will never forgive myself for hurting you. Not even if I live for hundreds of thousands of years," he insisted.

"I know. I love you. It doesn't matter how upset I am. I'll always love you. And that's what'll hurt the most when I watch you say 'I do.' She doesn't deserve you, Edward." At this, the tears started rolling through my body in sobs. Edward didn't say anything; he just wrapped his arms around me and let me cry.

He pressed a light kiss to my forehead. "And I'll never in a million years deserve you, Angel."

"Bella?" I heard my best friend call through the loft. I knew her voice was posed as a warning. I pushed Edward out of my bed, and he stumbled for the door. I heard him make his way down the stairs to where Alice and his *gag* fiancée waited for him.

"Where's Bella?" I heard Tanya chirp in the way my best friend usually did; it was a voice that fitted solely Alice. I moaned at the thought of her coming up.

"I gave her some Advil pm; she's passed out," Edward answered dishonestly.

"Okay, well tell her that I hope she's ok and that we'll get together some other time when she feels better. I had fun Alice," Tanya concluded.

"Alrighty, We'll see you around," Alice sighed.

"Come on, Eddie. I have a lot of making up to do," Tanya purred.

"Mmhmm." was Edward's only reply, but it sounded more seductive which made me angry with him all over again. And without his presence in the room, my anger was undiluted.

"Are you okay?" Alice's tiny frame stood at the door. She only briefly interrupted my fury.

"Do I look okay?" I growled. I knew I didn't. I probably looked like night of the living heartbroken.

"So what are we going to do?" Alice sat down next to me.

"I don't know, but I'm fucking furious," I lashed out at her. I know it was wrong to take my anger and stupidity out on Alice. She didn't say anything though. I guessed that she understood.

"Believe me, I know. I want to rip his dick off." Now that was a true best friend. She wasn't going sit by and let me wallow. We were going to get the fucker back. I may have loved him, but he was going to pay for what had happened. That much was certain.

"You know, he told me that he loved me," I whispered. Alice just scoffed and muttered "fucker" under her breath.

"This good actually," Alice said after I stewed in my rage for a few minutes more.

"What's good? That he ripped my heart out and smashed it into itty bitty pieces?" I snapped.

"No, but we have some amo to get back at him," Alice enthused.

"What do you mean?" I asked skeptically.

"Well you know that supplier for the flower shop? He is so totally into you. You can make Edward so blind with jealousy." I contemplated this idea for a minute or so.

"I can't use him like that," I said.

"You liked him a lot when you first started there." Alice eyed me. "You had already met Edward AKA 'asshole' when you decided that Jake was swoon worthy. Now, you have nothing holding you back, and if you can make him jealous than that's just a bonus."

"That was before I fell in love," I blurted before I could stop the words. I covered my mouth and sucked in my breath as if that would take them back.

"I knew it!" accused Alice.

"That doesn't mean I'm not madder than hell! He's got another thing coming if he thinks he can fuck with me. Get me the phone," I ordered Alice triumphantly. She complied easily. This was what she wanted. She'd given him a chance to explain himself, and I was still unhappy. It was now time for action.

First I called Tanya to let her know that I was feeling better. I thanked her for her concern and faked apologies. Then, I rescheduled for Saturday at a nice bistro that she picked. I welcomed her to bring Edward—joking that I might need saving. She readily agreed, and I made up an excuse for Alice. After I finally got away from Tanya's blathering, I called the hunky supplier for the flower shop. Jacob was Edward's opposite in every way. He was tall, tan, and handsome. Jake had dark hair that he had just recently cropped short and dark brown eyes. I always told him that it was because he was so full if shit. I asked Jacob if he wanted to go grab a bite to eat tomorrow, a question to which my supplier readily acquiesced. I told him about my favorite lunch spot, and he told me he'd pick me up at the flower shop around 12, insisting that lunch was his treat.

I also completely ignored Edward's 90 bajillion calls. He really wasn't getting the hint. I didn't want to talk to him, which was probably confusing to him. He left here thinking that we were ok because he told me that he loves me. I did read one of his texts-the first one: _I didn't have sex with her, promise. Love Edward._

"Well I'm with you in betrayal-ville. Jasper knew. He knew, and he didn't tell me. I was just as blindsided as you were," Alice ranted. "Can you believe him? His excuse was, 'He's been my best friend since we were toddlers, Alice. What was I supposed to do?'" I was lifted out of my funk a little by Alice's imitation of her boyfriend.

"No, I get that. If you were cheating on Jas I wouldn't tell Edward. We haven't known them a shit load of time Alice," I didn't want her to be mad at me, but Jasper had a point. She just 'humphed'. "A week is a short amount of time to fall in love. I know that it seems ridiculous, but I can't shake that earth-shattering feeling when we're together."

"You have to look smokin' tomorrow," she exclaimed, effectively getting the subject away from my shitty love life. I sighed, knowing she meant hours on the bathroom. "Chances are Edward'll stop by at noon thinking I dressed you up for him."

"Don't jinx it, Alice," I warned.

"Get some sleep sweetie. I'm going to have you up bright and early tomorrow." she smiled sweetly, but I was afraid. I couldn't stop think that although I was pretty sure that I loved him, it wasn't going to be enough. Alice was right, I needed to move on, even if my heart wrenched at the idea.

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><p><strong>Miss me? Okay, please oh please do not get mad at me. I won't promise a HEA because that would ruin the suspense. I like to keep everyone on their toes. Also, if I told you what was going to happen, why would you come back to me? So, stick with me and we'll see where this thing goes. One more thing that I'm sure is on everyone's mind is the "I love you"s. Yes, it is very soon, but when you feel it, you feel it. My parents waited 3 years to get married. My best friends, 3 months. I'm pleased to report both marriages are going strong. So, again, just stick with me. Reviews are accepted with a shit eating grin, so please leave them. Until next time...<strong>


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